I laughed when you mentioned feeling very confident after having four children and then number five being more of a challenge. The same thing happened to me after having my third child (he was such an easy baby, sleeping through the night at 2 months!). My fourth child really humbled me!
I come from a very large family. My paternal grandmother had 16 children (one set of twins) and my maternal grandmother had 12 children. I am one of 10 children, and I have given birth to 10 of my own. Most of my siblings have not had many children (the most is two children) or none at all for varying reasons.
Among my peers what I see the most is fear of providing materially for a large family. People's standards differ regarding what is essential for their family, how much money they need to have saved, what kind of education they want or can afford, etc. My husband's income is on the lower level compared to most of our peers. I think of my grandparents and parents often. They were open to having children despite being financially "prepared" or as comfortable as they would have liked to be. Especially my maternal grandparents who were pretty poor (two bedroom house with 12 children and roadkill for dinner!). But, oh, were they blessed beyond measure with their children and the grandchildren that came after them! I am pretty sure I have more than 100 first cousins!
I laughed when you mentioned feeling panicky about not having enough children when your eldest went to college. I get it! Our eldest is almost ready to leave the nest. I look at our eighth and think "Is he really the last one? Surely there's at least one more that needs to arrive."
I laughed when you mentioned feeling very confident after having four children and then number five being more of a challenge. The same thing happened to me after having my third child (he was such an easy baby, sleeping through the night at 2 months!). My fourth child really humbled me!
I come from a very large family. My paternal grandmother had 16 children (one set of twins) and my maternal grandmother had 12 children. I am one of 10 children, and I have given birth to 10 of my own. Most of my siblings have not had many children (the most is two children) or none at all for varying reasons.
Among my peers what I see the most is fear of providing materially for a large family. People's standards differ regarding what is essential for their family, how much money they need to have saved, what kind of education they want or can afford, etc. My husband's income is on the lower level compared to most of our peers. I think of my grandparents and parents often. They were open to having children despite being financially "prepared" or as comfortable as they would have liked to be. Especially my maternal grandparents who were pretty poor (two bedroom house with 12 children and roadkill for dinner!). But, oh, were they blessed beyond measure with their children and the grandchildren that came after them! I am pretty sure I have more than 100 first cousins!
Wonderful! You are so right. "Better a dinner of herbs where love is... "
I laughed when you mentioned feeling panicky about not having enough children when your eldest went to college. I get it! Our eldest is almost ready to leave the nest. I look at our eighth and think "Is he really the last one? Surely there's at least one more that needs to arrive."